-J[o]N-J[o]N-

GrEaT d@Y M@n!!!!

2005-12-10T07:33:00.000-08:00

today i reali enjoy myself in playin bb n went shoppin wit my bro n frenx.... at first morin at 10am we play bb until 3 den after that go hm n bath change al this den go mit bee n head to jurong to mit phelia n taohin.. den we shop n i was intend to find new cloth for myself bt unfortunately ther is isn't any cloth i lyk den after that we had our dinner n phelia n taohin went to find phelia auntie den bee n i went to lot to mit chao ta my BRO.... den after mittin her, we shop cos i wanna buy cloth ma so we went to gio n we three plan to buy the same cloth agn n be4 that i went to bossini n bought a long sleeve for myself... quite nice for mi bt i donno wat others wil think.... so after that we headed home sweet home.... i wish we cld went out 2gether agn....

2005-12-09T04:22:00.000-08:00

toDAY gt friendly match.... and i mit darren at bangkit at 2... den when i reach bankit wit sam... we sat outside the lrt to wait for darren to cum den a while later she n her sista came out of the lrt n i was shock lorx.. sam n i was lookin at dem n they saw us too... den somethin jus cross my mind abt wat li ling told mi.... n they walk off.. until darren came n i told him den he sae issit... i was thinkin dat issit they cumin to watch the friendly match bt until we reached the sch den i noe they nt cumin to watch the friendly match.. they jus go to sch n buys books... so i was lyk sianx sianx liao.. bt i told myself dat i had make a decision so i think i shld nt be unhappy... as ther is a friendly match ahead.. n i don wanna affect my mood too... so jus be happy...

erm... our team get scolded by mr hang cos we did nt move those tables n bench n we al get punish... den everyone was lyk sianx sianx no mood al tis.. bt after match start.... we thought dat we wil be losin cos we did lose to dem be4 n it is the facts dat we r nt dat great to fight wit dem.. bt the facts is we beated dem 65 to 29..... we won n everyone was so happy.... n they oso did nt think dat we wil won the match n our coach was so happy n after the match he treat us dinner at bangkit.... n after eatin we thought we wuld be goin off bt our coach klp tok n tok n tok until 6 somethin den we go off....

lonely......

2005-10-26T20:21:00.000-07:00

i had nt blog for such a long period.... haix... on 14.08.90 we stead n on 21.10.90 she broke up wit mi... n it was such a sudden... fast den a lightin.. n i jus donno y she wanna brk wit mi, haix... n nw i can't do anythin accept wait for her, secretly stay by her side.... n on 21.11.90.. she wil gif mi an ans whether we could continue, bt nw, i don think we cld continue cos she can't forget her ex.. haix...wat to do???? i can't do nthin.....

without her by my side i m lose, i m lonely, i m mad n i m goin insane..... haix.. i onli noe tt i reali cant live without her.... every night my tears drop n i jus cld nt stop it from flowin down from my eye.... can anyone tel mi wher did i done wrong that i had to take tis kind of punishment???? i reali donno y she wanna brk wit mi when ther is nthin happen to us... i onli noe tt, until her ex came online to cht wit her.... by den she wan him bck n rather gif up mi.... haix.... i m reali sad tt when tt time she is my stead n she rather choose her stead den mi??? why heaven had to punish mi by makin her leave mi??? why why why????? And nw i gt nthin left accept my bros..... haix.... i reali nid her alot alot.... i hope on 21.11.90.... i cld get her bck to my side again... i reali don wish to leave her... i did treasure her, i did rang her n i did nthin wrong n wat i get is a sadness,lonelness n a knife cut straight into my heart... bleedin...

MEI LIN.... i wan u to noe one thing is tt on fri tt is 21.10.90...... he jus brk up wit redia(3E1)..... n pervious days he sae he did nt stead wit her n sae nobody wil believe him.... i wun anyhow yuan wang him cos i noe the feelin..... i try be4.... n so i wan u to noe tis.... i nt wanna make u two de so cal JIE MEI relationship becum wat..... n i noe u wanna sae u two is nt stead.. n i noe is u promise steven koh that u wun stead wit him until o level had finish n i think u wil wait ba.. cos u did told mi be4 n i m hurt by u again... cos u said tis... i m sad to heard tt... n i tel u, no matter hw much u tel mi u don wanna gif mi hope... i wil stil wait n wait n wait.. i wun gif up... n in my eye u always my stead... i did nt fang u... n u did said be4 tt u wil hold on to our relationship n u oso said tt u wun fang mi n nw wat i get???? haix.... bt i wil stil wait... i wun blame ya.. n i promise u tt if we cld get bck again.. i wil change... i wil show u a different mi...

2005-07-12T20:42:00.000-07:00

haix...
i m sad.. damn sad.. afternoon ok ok wit her den after tt again argue n tis time worse...haix... she sae wat she gt stead.. knna... wanna tel lie oso dono hw to sae.. u think iwil believe u issit? knna... i m nt a fool!!! u don be the second gal tt take mi as a fool n play around!!! she sae wun forgive mi forever... den i sae don forgif don gif la.. knna.. big deal issit? fuck off la... chhe bye.... sae i gif attitude.. u lie to mi first lorx.. knna... chee bye..fuck off frm my sight la... see my true colour den see my true colour la... chee bye... i can worse den joel lorx... don make mi do tt!!!! I HATE LIAR!!!!!

2005-07-09T23:13:00.000-07:00

haix... damn sad... ytd was the second time i so sad.... the worse is i cry for her too!!! y? y i wil cry cos of her?? haix.. wat to do? we two had to relationship... we jus strangers to each other frm ytd onwards!!! my damn fuckin brith is cumin n i nw is sadness period, hw i goin to enjoy laugn al tis?? haix... we don belong to each other! he reali mine! n 4 eva! i wun be contact her anymore! my mind nw is get away n avoid her... i donno wat i m thinkin... haix...

today mornin went play bb wit bao bee li ling shu bin darrren sam n joel den after tt sae wee kiong chu hao n jolith.. den we onli tok to wee kiong n chu hao.. we r bad we noe.. bt y we wil hate him... haix.. don wish to elaborate much abt it... on fri bb trainin n i nv bring excuse leta so i chse to do 100 push up n today wake up hand al pain plsy bb al air ball... bt after tt can score... today whole day i was givin a sad face n some du lan face... haix... after playin bb went hm bath n we went to bee sec hse at clementi... condo sia.... haix.. darren nv go den laine n bao yuan gt go... haix... we actually wanna go her hse swimmin de.. bt in the end nv.. we go to the swimmin pool n see den we saw a room inside gt pool so we play n we relax ther... haix..we kindly sad lorx... monday goin to cum, hw??? cant pon sch again.. tis yr i pon alot liao.. bt i wil try to pon.. haix.... n oso gif mi a feelin of nt interested in studies n wanna quit sch!!! haix....

i reali donno wat i m thinkin lorx... we always argue i already xi guan liao.. n think ther wil nt be next time.... everythin is a lie!!! knna.... i HATE my life!!!! she did sae i no use den must as well go die.. den i nw make myself suffer... i slash i eat pill.. she must be happy.... she wish tt i can leave sch or even leave tis world... den she wun hav any prob.... wt the fuck man!!! n i sae fine!!! i jus continue slash my hadn.... i find out tt tis time i slash my hand my hand wil swollen n is deep enough.. bt i jus don feel pain.. i tel myself tt i everyday wil slash two lines... haix.. n i wil nt blog much, don wanna tel anyone anythin... bt bee wanna noe so i blog for the last time.. i wil nt often cum n blog.. haix.. damn sad.. another _ _ _ _ _ _ ...... make until i wanna do those toopid things n make myself to suffer when i klp sae ppl nt to do!! haix.... n i wil harm myself... i promise!!!! end here..

2005-07-07T22:12:00.000-07:00

today in class after recess den we gt tok a little... den today is thursday so goin to tuition wit dem... someone start smkin donno y she wanna.. haix...y she wanna??? haix.... onli harm he4r health although i myself oso gt smk bt i was different frm her cos i already addicted n i had smk for yrs... haix....

after sch went hm n change den mit dem den laine n bee cum my hse use com den li ling cal n sae we lie to her, bt i nv.. i truth tt i gt tuition n had to go hm den bee is she jus rmb tt she told her mom tt she 5 somethin den end her sch lesson den liling sae we don wanna mit dem den sae... bt we reali nt ma... haix..

reach tuition cher hse.... den time ups den we start tuition den is lyk vry lag lorx.. lyk frenx teach frenx liddat lorx.. anytime can stop n cht others things lyk nobody cares... diff frm other tuition... den my tuition cher gt dog den they sae he lyk to masterbed ppl legs n hands.. den i feel vry digust n don dare to get close to my cher dog... n nt i scare dog.... den a while later jun hao n linz lyk argue al tis.. oso donno y linz today bad mood liddat.. den think she nt lyk tuitionin today onli doin her own things or sit ther do nthin.. bt i darren jun hao n gwan continue to do our revision tt cher wan us to do... den tuition end she walk to lrt herself den gwan go n chase her.. den i jun hao n darren went to provision shop n eat cup noddles....

y she liddat de???? reali wish to tok to her personally n ask her wat happen n ask her wat she wanna do??? she oso unhappy wit mi.. i noe y cos i smk bt i did smk less.... i reali smk less.. y can't u believe mi... u cant expect mi to stop right nw....haix... pls belive mi??? n u did promise mi tt both of us had no secret among us!!!!! RMB ok??? i do care n concern abt ya!!!! n don cold war wit mi le... we already had cold war for so long le den u stil wanna continue??? don do tt to mi can??? i'm stress of manys things!!!!! haix... end here....

2005-07-06T05:51:00.000-07:00

haix... wat a borin day i had in sch.... i tok less in class today n nt cos i wanna study or wat.... i jus donno y i klp silence for a period.... i jus simply sad ok..... my life is BORED!!!! i hate my life... bt wat can i do??? haix...

today after assembly went to take cigg den went to lot mit bee li ling shu bing phelia n kai xin.... we actually wanna go to watch movie bt we klp drag n drag den time pass den we went to k box... we spent 88.10.... i wear unifrom go bt i nt usin student price, i use normal price so can drink beer....n i oso smoke in the rm, i don care at or neither do i gif it a damn..... so sianx... we sing n sign n shout al the way.... we make until the rm so dirty.... den we sing until 8 den i went hm den liling bee they al went to plaza mit viven ba.. think so...

she ytd sms mi sae i purposely blog somethin den sae until she don gif mi chance... bt i donno whether tt time our fake stead is she reali gif mi chance or wat.. jus donno... n i reply her tt " i thought u sae don tok to u?" den she nv reply den today in class we did nt tok at al!!!! i had sae we r mend to be argue everytime... i'm sick of tt... u think i lyk to argue issit?? n tml goin to their tution... donno wat to do too??? haix... surely klp quiet!!! haix... sad.. sad.... u jus donno wat i'm thinkin neither do i noe U... think we wil had a cold war for a long period this time..... i hate my life!!!! haix... nthin to blog too... i don even noe wat i'm thinkin.. think i had changed... changed bck to last time tt they sae i'm a cool person... haix...wat to do??? i donno... jus don feel lyk tokin....
she ok le... nt tt sad... bt i think i make another person sad.. bt think she don care at al!!!! cos she herself donno wat she thinkin n she had a difficult position btw mi n a guy.. so i chse nt to contact her.... think she don mind too.. or mayb she don even wanna care at al.. i jus wish everyone was find n had PEACE.... we r nt born to quarrel abt anythin or fight abt anythin... haix... reali nthin to blog le... end here...

2005-07-06T05:50:00.000-07:00

..... h@iX.....

2005-07-05T20:34:00.000-07:00

today they wanna settle things wit her..... den i oso nv care cos nt my business... den bee chao ta n my godsista shu bing came to my sch outside, den we sit at sch outside de void deck tok tok smoke smoke n eat eat... long time nv so manys ppl liddat liao... bt everytime at ther surely no gd things de... surely is bad things de... so sianx...

ytd when to watch intial D wit bee n sam.. den after tt went to mit shu bing li ling mich n phelia cos we r goin to her hse to eat dinner cos was her birth n we haven bought present for her....bt we wil return de... hehex... when we reach phelia hse we settle down n a while later sam n joel play majong n i jus sittin ther look hw they play.. i noe hw to play bt nt tt expert.... n if i play i sure lose money de.... so don play beta... after they had played finish, we went to phelia cousin hse to cut her cake... and the majong shu bing won the most cos someone hlp her played ma... hahax... when we reach phelia hse others was playin cards.... n bee n i jus sit at the sofa n watch tv the YOU FU..... den abt 10pm we cut the cake n we smoke n we went hm... when i reach hm my dad ask mi did i smoke n drink i sae nope, nt he surely nag at mi liao.. den he don believe den he smell my shirt.. den he did nt sae anythin den i went inside my room put things n bath... i wondering y my dad did nt smell the cigg smell.... be4 i went hm i smoke 1 stick....

today do chi hw in class... POA lesson do wanna finish liao den teacher confiscate... knna.. at first she see den nv sae anythin den darren go make the sound den she felt irritate den took it away n sae wun return.... think she nt in gd mood sia.... bt i gd mood leh.. den she took it away den sianx sianx liao... cos nid to redo ma.... den mine laine n darren being confiscate.... sam so heng sia... cher nv saw it...

den today last period is math.. bt cher nv cum so gt relive cher den goin off liao, den linz ask me nt to tok to her.. den i don tok to her i walk out of the clas liao.. so borin.. surely argue again.. haix.... we lyk everytime is arguin... jus donno y... we r fate to be in same class bt nt ........ she told mi tt when she n i had forget someone den we can start a relationship... bt i jus felt tt she jus givin excuse al tis bt wat can i do?????? i can't!!!!

tml mayb goin to watch intial D again.. wit bee laine vivien n .......... donno hu liao.. don feel lyk goin too, cos al gals.. den later surely knna ps de... sianx... i wish i had already reach 18... so tt i can SMOKE in front of my DAD.... hahaz.. so bad... bt is he sae de ma.. wan smoke den 18 den smoke nt always gif him so much prob n trouble for him n my mom to settle... i indeed BAD... i noe... my bro n frenx sae my mom is gd.. bt i can't see.... mayb is cos she is my mom ba.... cos i get along wit her longer... cos she is my mom... i jus can't feel it...

i'm sad... jus donno y... quite a few of dem ask mi whether i stil lyk her or wil angry al tis n sae wat surely hlp her al tis... haix.... i admit i stil lyk her ok????N oso hate her..... bt nw i don hate her much n my feelin for her was little, jus onli remain ther, jus donno y..... i oso wanna noe y, can anybody tel mi??? i wish i culd 4get her.... bt jus can't!!! donno y, we r in the same sch somemore her class was oppsite my class.... surely wil met into each other bt i always did nt try to see her al tis... i'm sad.... y everytime whenever someone wanna put in their love into a relationship n one of the party wil jus simply get HURT....i noe tt relationship reali wil make one of the party get hurt...

y someone treat BRG so complicated???? y? jus don understand.... a simple relationship can make it until so complicated....issit being hurt once n u wil continue being hurt abt relationship??? jus can't read her mind.... n wat DAO LI is tt gan mei cant lyk or hav feelin on gan ge.....wtf man!!!!! i hate reali do hate tis kind of excuse or reason tt u gif mi...it wil onli make our dist dift further n further..... haix.. jus don understand wat is LOVE... 4get it.... i jus noe tt wat urs is urs nt urs it wil nt cum to u..... haix... stop here...

2005-07-03T19:12:00.000-07:00

today... actually go to bee new hse to hlp her paint hse bt nv.... cos, nobody wanna go den i mit bee den we go kbox.... after tt joel cum n find us, den we extend the time to 5.3.... we sing manys song and we drink n smoke inside the room... after tt we went to lot downstair the coffee bean sit down n smoke....a while later joel cum to my hse n we cal darren n sam to cum my hse n bee went hm...

i had nt done my chi hw n if by tml i had nt finish i wil nt be goin to sch... i donno y i nt interested in studies after smoethin happen to mi n her... n after my mid yr i pon many days frm goin to sch... my life was sux bt my frenx was always ther for mi... n i had a godsis tt TENG mi...

life is so bored... i donno y tt i m sad... i donno y when she had trouble i was sad.... i donno y ther is so much prob btw her n so manys... is her fault or wat??? i donno... n i jus simply sad... i shld be hate her... bt i can't...life sux...